Ray and the Ging Homs

You Were Born On A Council Estate And Your Family Tree Looks Like A Spirograph Pattern

I Ate A Biscuit Over Your Shoulder As You Taught A Braille Reading Lesson

Your Pram Meets My Bulldozer

I Flambéed Ainsley Harriet

I Opened Up A Gay Bar So I Could Bash Poofs

Feng Shui Made You Move Your Kidney Dialysis Machine Away From A Plug Socket

You Won't Eat Meat But You'll Eat My Cock

Damilola Taylor Overcharged On A Blowjob

I Asked You To Dress Up As A Tart And You Came As An Apple Crumble

Dying Your Hair Is A Sign Of Individuality

Ethiopian Landmine Belly

Men Want Cars Women Just Want Penis'

Moslom's Have Beards So They Can Taste Cum Days Later

I Opened Up A Milkybar And Saw You Staring Back At Me

I Dug Up Jesus

I Sent You Photos of Peter Tatchell Fucking Your Wife

Spazzmatazz

Julian Clary is Your Social Worker

We Did A Mexican Wave At Your Execution

You Married Timmy Mallet

I Dipped Your Tampon In Syrup And Broken Glass

Your Money Or Your Kneecaps

I Put A Mousetrap In Your Wife

My Women Appreciation Class Started With A Screening of Conan The Barbarian

I Injected An Air Bubble Into Your Kids Brain To Make Him A Flid

You Have A Degree - Get AIDS and Die

I Pissed In Your Wife

You Thought It Was An Orgasm But I'd Actually Broken Your Spine

I Put A Salamander In Your Toilet To Make You Think You’d Miscarried

Your Sex Life Ended When You Wanked To Slayer

I Put Mustard Gas In Your Inhaler

My Anus Swallowed A Vibrator So Now My Poo Is Dancing

We Replaced Your Pacemaker With A Parsnip

I Injected An Air Bubble Into Your Kid's Brain To Make Him A Flid

Your Car Gear Stick Raped You

You Divorced Your Husband For Not Beating You Up Enough

You Found Your Grandma With Her Head In The Oven

We Moshed To Your Epileptic Fit

We Killed Jamie Bulger

The Pope Is A Rascist

I Sent The Pro-Life Party A Jiffy Bag Full Of Wank Session Donations

Nice Haircut Leukaemia Boy

Pingu Up My Ringpiece

Your Daughter Slit Her Wrists Cos We Gangraped Her

You Shit Turd Grapefruits ‘Cos You Did The Naked Locomotion With Nick Holmes

A Baby's Giggle Is A Come On

We Cut Your Kids Hair With A Lawnmower

You Said You Were A Poof So I Rested My Feet On You

You Woke Up To Find Your Brother Wanking into Your Mouth

My Mum's Screwing Yours